I have decided to skip the rollercoaster.
Not the fun one that flips me upside down and around at high speeds; no, not that kind – for that one I’ll be first in line! (Or at least, I hope so! Because everyone can agree that those lines are ridiculous!)
I’m skipping the exhausting emotional rollercoaster that dreadfully drags me around until I’m literally sick. Some call it a panic attack.
This mental battle is beyond comprehension!
This is a season of repeated promises given. It is so fun to watch God in-action as I learn how to surrender all to Him. At the Power and Love conference on a Wednesday night, we paired up with complete strangers and prayed together. I was feeling pretty darn special when I was given not one, not two, not three, but FOUR words of knowledge from God through this girl I had never met before.
Elated, I was on cloud nine! I had already received promises of new beginnings, that the drought is over, so this confirmation was just beyond amazing. Thank you, GOD!
Skipping through my day, I am just stoked. This is my season of breakthrough! Perpetual overflow is manifesting right now! My years of struggling are over! Praise the LORD!
Turns out there’s still more to learn (always).
The next day I listened to the podcast replay of the message that had been spoken that same Wednesday night at my home church in Los Angeles by Stephanie Ike. The topic of the message in L.A. just so happened to be on what to do when God gives you a word! Um, WOW.
Our God is so faithful He delivered words of knowledge to me where I was in Portland, while simultaneously giving me instructions as to what to do with them through Stephanie’s message in Los Angeles. Feeling just a tad more loved than everyone else, I am floating in the realm of blessed and HIGHLY favored. Look at God! His Spirit is moving, delivering me words and what to do with the words – How blessed can I be?!
It is true that when we seek Him with our whole heart, we will indeed find Him!
As I listened more, my eager excitement was quickly quieted as Stephanie shared that God gives us a word as instruction, confirmation, and also as a hopeful sneak-peak for what is ahead once this storm blows through our life! A word delivered usually means things are about to get real. Gulp.
Wait. So, these words of knowledge weren’t just to make me feel spoiled and excited?
And wait. So, not one, not two, not three, but FOUR storms are potentially heading my way?!
Oh man. This walk with God is no joke.
Stephanie went on to explain that the purpose of the word given is so the trials we are about to encounter don’t lead us to believe that we are off course, forgotten, or unloved.
Sure enough, just when everything seems to be set in life, everything – and I mean everything – begins crashing down.
And not only the normal life-storms (although those are happening too), but unthinkable storms, the kind that we wouldn’t and couldn’t even imagine.
On one hand, I have this divine promise as to what is ahead of me, and on the other, that seems pretty far away and useless at this point. Did I mention time is irrelevant to God? A day in His realm could be a thousand years in ours. Umm, great.
As the stormy winds blow through my trees of joy and the rains flood my peace, I spend hours crying,
questioning the words given, and wondering what to do! I sing praise songs, worship, meditate on the Word, dig in the Word some more. By the end of it all I am utterly exhausted.
After what seems like storm number 247 in less than 6-weeks I realize that the destination remains the same whether I cry, worry, stress, and fear – or not. In fact, the more I cry, worry, stress, and fear, the more I am wasting my own thoughts and energy on anything but trusting God. I have to ask myself Do I believe God or not? Do I trust Him or not? As children of God we have one job: to believe Him.
Worry has been my master for too long; all the while I am claiming to trust my Lord. It is really quite ineffective living in such a way.
I have been believing the lie that worrying makes me responsible.
I worry because I care.
Because it shows everyone else how hard I’m trying.
Never in the Bible does it say, “Worry until the storm is over and then be happy.”
This painfully exhausting stretch in faith is the greatest gift.
So, no more. No more hours of crying and questioning.
With His grace, I shall move through every storm confidently knowing that my God is bigger than any storm I could ever encounter. Not only is He bigger, but He has already conquered every storm. He’s just waiting on me to get on His level so I may be a conqueror, too.
Have you ever found yourself stuck on an exhausting emotional roller coaster leading nowhere?! How do you reframe your mind when this happens? Share your comments in the text box!
Thank you, God for your faithfulness. You truly are there for those who seek you with the entirety of their heart. Bless the person reading this with favor, grace, faith, and most of all the peace that surpasses all understanding. May we never forget the authority we have over the storms in You; for the waves and wind still know Your name.
Song reference: It Is Well (Live) by Kristene Dimarco, Bethel Music
Photo by Matt McK